What a difference a year makes

One year ago I was sitting in a conference room working on my team's latest software release. It was a Friday. It was 11:11 a.m. I had my e-mail up and I was surprised to see an e-mail from my agency coordinator show up and I read the words that forever changed my life.

For the first time, here's her e-mail in full:

Hi Diann,

Okay I met the little girl I was telling you about and she is really a sweetie! Her papers say she turned 5 on October 31st, which is the date she came into the orphanage. I would say she is probably on the older side of 5 though. ll of her tests have come back negative and her papers are ready to be filed. If you think she is a little older than you were planning, there are two families ahead of you for 4 and under girls. However we do have two girls in their age ranges in our care so that could substantially affect how long you would wait for a little younger of a girl. My computer is having trouble with letting me attach pictures, I have tried for about 30 minutes sorry! If you go to the snapfish, and look in grace's trip to ethiopia she is the girl in the blue shirt in DSC00080 and DSC00088. There are other pictures of her in this album and in Lee XXXX's. I know this is a lot to take in, so feel free to call me.

Grace

Everyone who knows me knows I am a very sensitive and emotional girl and I had often read about other people's reactions to seeing their child's face for the first time. I thought mine would be one of glorious tears and gasps of "Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness."

What was my initial reaction? "That kid's not 5." Yep, that's it. No motherly instincts kicked in, just trying to determine how old she actually was. I asked my agency coordinator about the age discrepancy and she told me that she had met Bizunesh and that she was definitely in that range.

I remember Aimee asking me how old I thought she was...I said 7. She asked me how old was my age range and I told her 5 and then I almost choked at the thought of "passing" on this child.

And then my faith started to kick in.

I remember closing the door of my office and staring into the photos I had of Bizunesh. I remember whispering "Are you my little girl? Are you the daughter God has chosen for me?" And I remember the still, small voice that spoke directly to my heart that asked me if 7 was too old to need a mommy. And then I sent this e-mail back to my agency coordinator.

"I say YES!"

And one year later I am so glad I did.

One year later, this long-legged beauty bounced into my bedroom this morning, giggly and said "Good morning Mommy."

One year later, this is truly the stuff dreams are made of!